


Deadline

by thrysce



Category: Weekend Update (SNL)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 12:44:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14694492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thrysce/pseuds/thrysce
Summary: Seth is forced to face his fears on live TV May 18, 2013.





	Deadline

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY 5th ANNIVERSARY!!!

Seth didn’t know what to think in those first few seconds. He didn’t know what to think of the situation and he certainly didn’t know what to think of himself. He ignored the pain that shot through his chest and refused to acknowledge that his heart was breaking. Shattering like glass as he tried to keep a straight face. He didn’t watch as Stefon stormed off stage and through the exit doors, headed to his wedding.  
  
Instead, Seth acted like his only concern was getting on with the show.  
  
Seth heard the ‘awww’s of the audience and tried not to think about how often he let those ‘awwws’ dictate his actions. Like asking Stefon to be his Valentine or inviting Stefon to New Hampshire. He always felt at the mercy of the audience. But now he sort of thought it wasn’t the audience at all.  
  
He’d tried to argue with his ex-girlfriend that he didn’t _want_ to make her walk to the beach to meet him and Stefon, it was the audiences’ fault. But he knew even then it was a ridiculous lie and she had known it too. She’d almost broken up with him on the spot, but somehow they had made it up until just two months ago when he cancelled their Mexico trip to spend Spring Break with Stefon instead. He hadn’t been able to make up an excuse good enough and he’d been confused by the relief that flooded him when she finally told him it was over.  
  
He knew he couldn’t keep blaming the audience, but he still felt like they were somehow in control of his life. Or maybe it was just that they often opened his eyes to things he hadn’t been able to see. Like now, when they were clearly telling him he’d made a mistake.  
  
He tried to ignore them and everything that was spiraling through his mind by concentrating on the next segment. A cute joke about tree frogs, but he couldn’t even get through the first line.  
  
Everything hit him hard and all at once. The thought of Stefon listing off psychotic nightmares to someone else made his throat feel like it was closing up. He couldn’t stand the thought of Stefon smiling that crooked, mischievous smile at anyone else. He thought of the way Stefon always said his name, soft and sultry, and could not stand thinking of Stefon saying another person’s name like that.  
  
Especially not the way he had during the summer vacation they’d taken. When they’d been sitting under the stars, Stefon’s frame wrapped loosely around Seth's and Stefon had said, “It could be like this, Seth Meyers.” And Seth had been scared by how much he’d wanted that even though he wasn’t sure what he’d be agreeing to. So he laughed it off and said, “I don’t think my girlfriend would like that.” And instead of the normal pout and attempts to elicit sympathy from strangers, Stefon had grown eerily quiet. Things had been awkward after that and then suddenly Stefon showed up with Derek Zoolander in their next segment.  
  
That was the first time jealousy had risen its ugly head in Seth Meyers. But Zoolander’s attention span was even shorter than Stefon’s and they had stopped seeing each other rather quickly, putting Seth at ease. Stefon hadn’t seemed upset about the breakup which lead Seth to believe he’d only done it for attention. It was a thought that should have made Seth mad, but it oddly only made him feel good. He was aware that it wasn’t a healthy way to feel, so he’d kept it to himself.  
  
Seth tried to get through the joke again. It was a simple one, it should have come easy, but he couldn’t do it. His mind was completely else where. He thought about how Saint Patrick’s day had a new and special meaning to him after Stefon kissed him for the first time. Even though he’d been shocked and a tad embarrassed, he’d also spent the rest of the night and the whole next day walking on air. When he’d watched the tape back, he’d been surprised by how long he’d let the kiss go on. It had sparked the first big fight with his now ex-girlfriend and he really should have started re-evaluating things way back then. Not now, not when it was already too late.  
  
He felt Amy’s hand on his shoulder, “Go to him.”  
  
Seth bit back some emotion, “It’s too late.” He’d taken Stefon forgranted. He'd let Stefon heap attention on him but only gave it back in fractions. Stefon deserved someone who would never let him feel unloved or unwanted, who wasn’t _afraid_ of his own feelings.  
  
And that’s what this was, wasn’t it? Seth fearing his own emotions. At first he had told himself that it was Stefon’s bizarre other-worldly experiences that scared him and made him want to keep the other man at arm’s length. But over time if became apparent that it was actually the emotions Stefon elicited that he was afraid of. He was afraid of his own burgeoning curiosities and desires. He told himself he didn't want to go to Slice or Slash or Booooooooof and he most certainly did not have feelings for his City Correspondent. But those falsehoods were choking him and now that he was suffocating in a sea of his own lies, he understood what they really were: truths he had spent this whole time running from.  
  
“It’s never too late,” Amy said, her voice soft and supportive.  
  
And maybe Seth was just waiting for someone to tell him what he already knew. Someone who wasn’t the audience (who had weird whims to begin with) or his ex-girlfriend (who seemed to accuse him of anything when she was angry). Someone like Amy, who was his friend and had asked him once before what his feelings were but he’d just laughed and changed the subject. He’d been so afraid this entire time, but now he realized the only thing more terrifying than facing his own feelings, was losing Stefon. It only took a fraction of a second for Seth to make up his mind. He ran for the door amid the cheers, laughter, and shouts of the audience.  
  
As Seth ran down the streets of late night New York City, he felt like he was breaking out of a cocoon. He had changed so much these few short years and it was all thanks to Stefon. He thought about how relieved he’d been when his ex dumped him and this felt like the opposite. His heart was seized in fear and anguish, and he knew if he let Stefon go now, he would never forgive himself. He only had to persuade Stefon to give him a second chance.  
  
He burst into the church on the second floor. The pews were packed and Seth felt sick to his stomach thinking about how this had all been planned out, it’d been organized and decided somehow without him knowing. How had Stefon kept quiet about this?  
  
Seth yelled Stefon’s name because it was the only thing he could think of. Everyone turned to him and Seth noted the left side was filled with the people Stefon had only told him about and on the right were a bunch of stiffs in suits that Seth was starkly aware would be _his_ side of the room if he were the one down there. But instead it was… it was… Cooper.  
  
Stefon called his name like he was asking to be rescued and Seth knew that he’d been given his second chance. He raced down the stairs and was met with an angry Anderson Cooper. Seth couldn’t blame him. He’d be angry too. He didn’t know what Cooper knew about the relationship between Seth and Stefon, but judging by his reaction, he knew enough. Cooper looked ready to throw-down but Seth didn’t have time for that. He conked Cooper in the jaw when he looked like he was going to pull out some kind of pro-wresting move.  
  
Seth shouldered his way through the crowd of angry wedding-goers. And because Seth was a writer, he had the explicit notion that this was symbolic somehow. The screaming and clawing mob trying to get him to change his mind was him facing all his fears in the flesh. He spotted a human fire extinguisher, some Furkles, Alf in disguise, the now rabid stiffs-in-suits, the Jewpids, and then he grabbed Gizblo because he looked like the most dangerous thing that would fit in Seth’s hand. He grabbed Stefon with his other hand and pulled him behind him.  
  
The scene that followed was like something out of a nightmare and it would have had Seth backing down as early as a week ago, but because he felt renewed, revived, and reborn, he couldn’t fathom it. Not now, not when he was so close. Not when he could feel Stefon’s hand in his.  
  
Seth tried to ignore the shouts of the wedding-goers, of Stefon’s friends yelling that Seth wasn’t worth it and that Anderson was _such_ a nice guy. Seth held firm to his resolution and judging by how hard Stefon was squeezing his hand, it was the right choice.  
  
Seth was mid-contemplation about how they were going to get out of there in one piece, when DJ Baby Bok Choy showed up to save them. Seth made a mental note to write him a thank you letter… and maybe a check for hospital bills if he needed… he was also thankful to know not all of Stefon’s friends hated him. But he was heartened further by Stefon’s brother cheering them on from the centre of the crowd as they made their getaway.  
  
They ran back to the studio because it was the nearest, safest place Seth could think of and because he needed to show Amy and the audience and everyone else that he _had_ followed his heart and it had lead straight to Stefon. The city blurred by in whirling colours and sounds. He could hear Stefon breathing behind him and he held Stefon’s hand as hard as he could. He looked back whenever he could to see Stefon holding his veil to his head, tears brimming in his eyes. Seth felt he knew exactly what he was feeling and could feel the tears in his own eyes too. Pulling Stefon after him, bringing him back to where he belonged. It felt euphoric. He thought about the future and realized that he had no idea what was going to happen from here on out. He wondered if either one of them actually knew what they were doing. But for the first time, that didn’t bother him. Seth wasn’t scared anymore and, with Stefon next to him, he felt like perhaps he never would be again.

 


End file.
